Holiday Card-Writing Tips from The Hired Scrooges

holiday card collageDear Friends and Family (and the three other people who read our blog),

Thinking about sending a holiday card? Good for you! Here are a few tips to up your game … and avoid embarrassment with those who are too lazy to write their own cards and just sit around critiquing yours (ahem).

1. Don’t Write Everything In Title Case! OR ALL CAPS.

This Is Not Only Wrong, IT HURTS OUR EYES. Use regular old sentence case, and while we’re at it, it’s “Happy New Year,” not “New Year’s” or “New Years.” (Although Season’s Greetings is correct.)

2. Go easy on the exclamation points!!! Please!!!

We know of a law professor who tells his students that the only appropriate time to use exclamation points is when writing a note to a little girl named Suzie. Your holiday card might fall closer to Suzie on the celebration spectrum, but come on, let’s keep things in perspective.

Yes, maybe Junior getting into Harvard (or any college at all if he’s a real slouch) is worth exclaiming about, but changing the color of your bathroom tile? Sorry, no. In fact, don’t write about that at all. Seriously. Unless you want your friends and family to feel sorry for you because you have such a painfully boring life.

3. The plural of your last name does not take an apostrophe. Trust us.


Not this way:

The Dempsey’s


This way:

The Dempseys


The Dempsey Family

4. If you insist on a letter describing all that’s happened this year, does it need to be two pages? Single-spaced, in size nine font?

No, it does not. Unless your last name is Bieber, Obama or Boo Boo, you don’t have an audience hanging on your every word. So keep it brief and include only the most interesting highlights. People have short attention spans, especially when there are presents to be wrapped and noses to be blown.

5. Ampersands can be cute and they save you some characters, but they don’t belong in sentences or next to a comma. Ever.


Dan, Anna, & Karen wish you a very happy holiday.


Happy Holidays from Dan, Anna & Karen

If you fail to comply with any of these tips, you risk your friends and family making fun of you behind your back. But who really cares about them anyway, right? Peace.

Happy Holiday’s From DAN, ANNA, & KAREN At The Hired Pen’s!!!!!!

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